Keeping Manu’s family close and a smile on his face
Manharlal ‘Manu’ Chauhan was cared for by St Catherine’s at home and in the hospice, keeping a smile on his face and his loved ones close throughouthis final months.
Here, his daughters Bhavna Navekar and Seema Shah share their family’s experience and remember their charming, cheeky Dad.
“It was all extremely overwhelming at the beginning. Being told Dad had stage 4 cancer was completely unexpected – he was diagnosed in January this year and spent four weeks in hospital. In February we were told there was nothing more they could do, so it all happened very fast. It was Dad’s wish to be at home in Fulwood with his family, and we believe that’s what kept his positivity going. But once we got back from hospital we were faced with bags of medication and the prospect of caring for him for ourselves, and we honestly thought ‘what have we done?’. It was so good to have him home, but it was very daunting. We didn’t want to get anything wrong.
We relied on the St Catherine’s advice line a lot – someone was always at the other end of the phone no matter what time of day or night we called, to answer any questions and reassure us. We also had our St Catherine’s Clinical Nurse Specialists (CNS), who worked with the District Nurses, and we had support from Marie Curie and Primary Care 24/7 too.
All the nurses and carers loved him! He was so charming and cheeky with them, even with everything he was going through.
Initially we were having more good days than bad, but he started to feel more unwell and unsettled. He’d always had a real zest for life – he was a true family man with a passion for badminton, and he was forever the entertainer, always the first on the dancefloor! He’d always been a foodie and a bit of a tech geek as well, but he wasn’t interested in his gadgets anymore and he wasn’t eating much, and it was difficult for us to see him like that.
That’s when our CNS broached the subject of the hospice. We thought it meant he would spend his final days there, but she explained that he could go in for a short time for pain management. This made a real difference to his quality of life.
He was cared for on the inpatient unit for two weeks, and that time actually gave us the chance to talk with Dad about his wishes for his final days and the legacy he wanted to leave. He was very clear that he wanted to be at home at the end, so once he returned home from the hospice in March, we were focused on making sure he was comfortable and calm. He died in his sleep on 8th April, aged 75.
He was also very adamant about which Hindu customs and traditions he wanted us to observe at his funeral, and he asked for donations to go to St Catherine’s and Marie Curie. It gave us peace of mind that we were able to honour his wishes.
It brings us some comfort knowing that we can stay connected with the charity that helped us so much when we needed it, giving something back to help others through fundraising and volunteering.
We experienced first-hand how much it means to have such compassionate care and support not just for the individual, but for the whole family, and we will be forever thankful for that.”
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